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Owner's experiences coping with Pet Loss. 

Marty - a male, short-haired, buff colored/big beautiful green eyes that showed his loving spirit.
It has only been twelve days since I elected to free Marty from his pain and let him run and play as the free, healthy spirit he was meant to be on Dec. 15. Marty would have been 13 years old in Jan. and had been receiving daily insulin injections for the past two and 1/2 years. During the initial injections, the treatments were not working and the vet suggested we try pig insulin, which sometimes gets better and more stable results with cats than the usual insulin humans use. The results were dramatic and overall, the next 2-1/2 years were fairly stable although we did have several scares with extremely low levels of sugar (very scary stuff). But I learned how to monitor and treat the low sugar and Marty and I "bonded" like mother and child. The injections became our morning routine followed by a few bites of tuna. The responsibility of treating a diabetic animal puts you in a "caregiver" position. When Marty suddenly became ill with vomiting, loss of weight, dehydration. and low sugar levels even with no injections I felt so helpless - after all I was his caretaker and he depended on me. After two weeks of this even with getting fluids he was just not better. The vet did blood work and x-rays which showed my best friend had an abdominal tumor with very high and abnormal liver readings - off the chart. While I did have the option of having an exploratory performed, with not very good odds, I decided it was time to release my dear friend from this suffering. I still feel so much guilt for not being able to help him although I realize this is the price of caring and loving and hope to be able to come to terms with this someday. During the last month of Marty's life, he would sit on my lap and just lovingly stare into my eyes like he was trying to tell me something. Marty was always a "lap" cat, but this behaviour was unusual - I now know he was trying to let me know that he had to go soon even though he did not want to leave me. While my heart is breaking from this loss right now, I would do everything all over again just for the pleasure of my dear Marty's company during the past twelve years and the excitement of knowing he and I will meet again on this side of the Rainbow Bridge. I miss him so! --
Contributed by Connie  December 2003




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Updated December 2003
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