Missy
(AKA
"The
Squirt")
8/11/94 - 7/19/05
Missy, honey... How do I even begin to tell
how much you enriched our lives, Little Girl?... and just how much we
miss you? I know my words will never be adequate but I will try.. You
came into our lives by chance.. I was ready for another pooch, after
losing 'Our Love, Puffy' but a little Maltese wasn't even a speck in
my mind. But, as I believe God had destined, he connected us and the
second I saw you, that little tiny ball of white fur that I could hold
in the palm of my hand, my heart knew we must have you in our lives.
All of your siblings were so cute too, but YOU, there was just
"something" about YOU!
From the moment we had you in our home, it
was amazing that so much personality could emanate from such a tiny
little dog... and with all your" kithes" and sweetness I
also knew you were a little feisty girl with lots of "'tude"...
and that's what won my heart over immediately.
I am so happy I started taking videos of you
and though I cant look at it yet, I know one day I will sit down and
view it and my heart will leap, and I will say a silent "Thank
You God" for having sent you to us. Missy, you were full of
"antics" and even now though thru tears, they make me
smile... it is not the antics themselves, but more your little
attitude when caught at something "bad" you had done... I
would reprimand you and you'd give me a look, it was more
"patronizing" than" true remorse" for having upset
mama. I guess you knew, no matter what, I loved you with all my heart
and nothing you could do would ever change that... and how right you
were! Besides, I think you knew, "how could anyone stay mad when
looking at that darling little face".
It took you less than a week to figure out
how to escape the confines of the kitchen (I still cant believe you
managed to squeeze thru that tiniest gap!) and made your way into the
bedroom to sleep near us. You didn't whine for our attention., you
simply curled up in a little ball on the rug beside the bed (well not
before a little "accident") and from there you made you way
into the comfy nook you made in our bed. You were always a determined
little squirt and thank God you were, for that is what got you thru
the trials you faced ahead... and there were many. However, you seemed
to love life too much to give up easily and you seemed to know your
capabilities better than any of us. You showered me with "kithes"
each and every morning, and what a beautiful start to my day that
was.... I sure do miss them!! No matter what problems you had, you
faced the day ahead with a "smiley-face" and a waggy tail.
Your tenacity amazed not only your mom and
dad but others as well. You taught me to not take things for granted.,
and to not give up easily no matter how "dire" things might
seem. It is that strong will you had that I now try to imitate as I
face the time ahead without you. You had such a zest for life and you
were a happy little dog for all but the few last days of your life.
You taught me so much, Little Girl, and you made me a better person.
Thru you, and my search to do the best I could for you with your
illnesses, I met so many wonderful friends... I think God arranged
that too, for He knew I'd need them desperately when it was time to
say good bye.
We tried our best to do everything possible
to give you a happy and "healthy" life. I so feared I'd not
be able to get past the "emotions", when you decided enough
was enough... and feared my love was so strong, that it would cloud my
vision to know what YOU wanted... and to be able to let you go. I
should have known better... we were so connected, that you told me
when you still wanted to fight the fight. And then at the last you
told me when you were tired and when you found life had not become
"fun" anymore. You did not really "complain" for
that was not your style, but you told me thru your eyes, and you spoke
to my heart... I knew... I just knew. But, I guess you knew I needed
"confirmation"... some tangible sign... so when my little
"cookie-monster" didn't want food of any kind, you were
telling me you had had it I had no choice but to listen to you. I
loved you too much not to. Oh, it would have been so tempting to try
to keep you going for whatever period we could still have you to hold
and cuddle but I vowed to you long ago that as long as you had the
"fight" in you I would fight with you and always help you...
and when you had enough and wanted to "rest", I would
respect your desire. I vowed I'd never let you endure suffering when
there was no more "fixing" available.
And so that day came, and with a broken heart
I knew I must live up to my vow to you. I like to think your
"big-sister", Puffy, was right there to greet you.
As I held you in my arms, and when you took
your last breath and headed on your new journey... I felt a surge in
my being and knew a part of me went with you and you left a part of
you with me., in that split second "exchange" we created
that circle of love that will never be broken.....
Rest well my sweet little girl... till we
meet again... and you will once again shower me with those sweet
morning "kithes".
Will Love you Always, "Squirt"...
your Mom
Sept/05
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