Where's the Dignity?

She's trouble, she's trouble, she's trouble!
She's getting hard to swallow, to swallow, to swallow.
She acts like she's my double, my double, my double;
Where'er I go she'll follow, she'll follow, she'll follow!

Where's the dignity?
With an audience when one must pee?
I'm not one to whine and to moan,
But why can't she leave me alone…
With my privacy?
To pee just for me?

My litter, my litter, my litter-
She's covered it with plastic, with plastic, with plastic!
My housemates are a-titter, a-titter, a-titter;
It's really quite fantastic, fantastic, fantastic!

Where's the dignity?
The respect for someone's privacy?
Don't care for her manner, her tone;
Just want her to leave me alone…
Alone when I pee!
To pee just for me!

And walking, and walking, and walking's
Become quite a sensation, sensation, sensation!
The other dogs are talking -- they're talking, and talking
Of my humiliation (-iation, -iation)!

Where's the dignity?
Would she like it, were it she, not me?
No matter; she'll reap what she's sown-
Disruption when she's on "the throne"!
C'mon, let me be,
When I've gotta pee!