Humor: You're a Pet Lover When...

 

Any Pet Owner
  • Poop, pee, or vomit are a topic conversation for you and your friends.
  • You refer to yourself as Mommy or Daddy, and you refer to your parents as your pet's grandparents.
  • You are an "aunt", "uncle" or "godparent" to someone else's pet.
  • You talk about your pet the way other people talk about their kid.
  • You know the name of your neighbor's pet, but you don't know your neighbor's name.
  • You have your pet's picture, and no one else's, on your office desk.
  • Your pet sleeps with you - in the center of the bed, while you are pushed off to the side.
  • Your pantry contains more varieties of pet food and treats than human food.
  • You think it's normal to find pet hair in your food.
  • You share your meals with your pet.
  • The only hairbrush you can find is your pet's, and you don't mind using it on yourself.
  • You've forgotten the color of your couch because it's been covered with a blanket for years.
  • Your nightstand or end-table is your pet's carrier.
  • You like people who like your pet. You despise people who don't.
  • You sign and send birthday and greeting cards from your pet. Or, you ink your pet's paw and sign it with a paw print.
  • You call home and leave a message on the answering machine for your pet.
  • Your pet is getting old and arthritic, so you build a ramp so he can get onto the bed by himself.
  • You have blankets strategically placed around the house just so your pet will always have a cozy spot. 
  • You'd rather stay home on Friday night and cuddle your pet than go out with your friends.
  • At the first sign of illness, you take your pet to the vet. But you haven't been to a doctor in years. 
  • You watch stupid tv shows because you are snuggled with your pet and can't reach the remote control.

Just for Cat Owners

  • Hairballs are a common topic of conversation among your friends.
  • You think it's normal to go to the warehouse store and purchase 200 pounds of kitty litter.
  • Cardboard boxes and sisal are part of your home decor.
  • You hang birdfeeders outside the windows just so the cats have something to watch while you're at work.
  • Your co-workers or neighbors refer to you as "the one with all the cats."

Just for Dog Owners

  • Friday night entertainment is making a huge bowl of popcorn and tossing most of it to your dog.
  • You can't see out the passenger side of the windshield because there are nose-prints all over the inside.
  • You have a kiddy wading pool in the yard, but no small children.
  • Your neighbors know it's almost bedtime because they hear you in the back yard trying to convince your dog to go pee.
  • The kitchen trash can is more or less permanently installed in the sink, to keep the dog out of it while you're at work.
  • You are the only person outside in sub-zero temperatures because your dog wants to go for a walk.

 


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Updated October 2000
This site is for information purposes only.  Please consult your veterinarian.